Friday, January 18, 2013
Princess made friends at school with the girl who sits next to her in band the first week. She came to both Princess's little back-to-school gathering at the park and her birthday party (at a different park!). Princess asked if the girl could come over to our house this weekend if it was okay with her mom.
I said sure and then expected her mom to call me.
Then I was shocked when I went to school to pick up Princess and BFF yesterday (from a half day because of exams) and the girl was waiting there with them with a backpack of clothes ready for a sleepover at our house. Princess was very stressed out and apologetic. She was as surprised as I was when the girl told her that her mom said yes, she could come over.
She assumed Princess meant she'd come home with us and spend the night. These were the details I had assumed I'd work out with her mom when she called me, which didn't happen.
BFF made it clear that she had NOTHING to do with any of it.
I didn't even have room in the backseat for her. There was a giant box of socks back there that wouldn't fit in my trunk. Somehow the girl and BFF squeezed in the backseat, though. We dropped the socks off at the Salvation Army, which is in between school and BFF's house. Then we dropped BFF off and I continued trying to figure out the situation.
The girl's mom's phone is disconnected. She doesn't know where we live and doesn't have our phone number (which is why they didn't call to confirm the invite - the girl lost our number.) Finally, the girl got a hold of her aunt, who lives with them. I wanted to know how to get her back to her family.
The girl is incredibly shy, so getting any info from her was a challenge. Plus, she was afraid I was mad at her and that she'd get in trouble at home. Once we got past all of the confusion, they had a really nice sleepover.
They painted their nails, played board games, did Wii cheer-leading and then messaged each other on Facebook.
Yup, I caved. I let Princess create a Facebook account. She's 12 and I've been adamant that she has to wait until 13. But she's recently been in communication with her oldest sister and Facebook is her sis's preferred message of communication. Well, actually it's texting, but we are way behind when it comes to cellphone technology!
So I told her she could make a FB account last night. She found out the friend sleeping over has one, which pretty much makes her and BFF the only girls they know without accounts. I'd been planning on letting her have one to make it easier to chat with her sister, so I told her to go for it. She knows I have total access and is still giddy with excitement over it.
This morning Princess and her friend are playing restaurant and making me breakfast. I ordered coffee and a green smoothie. Princess just came to inform me that there might be a delay because a lot of their workers called in sick. "It's flu season, you know," she said.
They are making themselves scrambled eggs, bacon (in the microwave) and toast.
They are getting along great and the dymanic is so much calmer than between her and BFF. I'm glad she's forming another solid friendship. She's had all her eggs in BFF's basket for so long and is devastated when BFF is busy, not allowed to play or doesn't want to get together.
BFF dumped her for a few months at the end of last school year and over the summer. (Princess was very jealous of BFF and another girl and BFF said "things" were said.) Princess had a "new BFF" during that time, but the friendship fizzled out when middle school started - also because of Princess's jealousy issues.
She had BFF picked up again, which has been going great. BFF still has the other friend and Princess still gets jealous. I'm hoping they'll all be able to handle this new friendship without Princess rubbing it in BFF's face or getting territorial again.
Little girl drama is hard enough without layers of trauma and attachment issues.